Quote of the Day: Moving On

It's easy to say we are over something. An emotion. A fight. Abuse. Addiction. It is easy to say and so much harder to live out. Moving on without dealing with it is impossible. Part of our soul stays stuck. Immovable in its grief. We may not recognize it for years but then it pops up again out of the blue. 

It's so much worse for people who stuff things inside. Are you like that? I know I am. I stuff. I say I'm fine. I try to make myself believe it. In the end, usually after a binge, I realize the truth. Why do I stuff things down inside as if I can't handle it? Oh wait, I know this one. It's because I am trying to deal with it all by myself instead of entrusting it to the One who can not only handle it but take it completely from me. 

Getting beyond something requires thinking, feeling, and prayer. It comes with understanding what we felt and why as well as why that feeling doesn't need to be with us anymore.

Is there anything you are struggling with moving past?

10 Bible Verses to Calm Your Soul

As you might know, I struggle with anxiety. But, here's a secret: I feel much less anxious when I am making time to be in God's word. I guess that's not really a secret but it changes my focus from me to God. Here are 10 Bible Verses that help calm me and I hope, with all my heart, that they help you as well.

Instead of just reading these, I recommend taking one that resounds with you the most and committing it to memory. When you are feeling most stressed or anxious, you will be able to pull this verse from your mind. It makes all the difference in the world, trust me.

Hillsong United :: Wonder CD Giveaway

As you all know, I am a huge fan of music in general. I have to say though that praise music is my fave. It is uplifting and connects me to God in a way I can't fully describe. I can't talk about praise music without mentioning Hillsong United. There are so many Hillsong United songs that I adore. So, when I found out there was a new full-length album by Hillsong United called 'Wonder' I was super excited. There are twelve songs and I've listed them below. By the way, can I say I love when they include all the lyrics in the CD booklet? I do!

1. Wonder
2. Shadow Step
3. Future Marches In
4. So Will I (100 Billion X)
5. Splinters & Stones
6. Glimmer in the Dust
7. Greatest of These
8. Shape of Your Heart
9. Not Today
10. Life
11. Rain/Reign
12. Water to Wine

I've been listening to this album on repeat and I've come to the conclusion that I love it! Shocked, aren't you? I thought I'd share the official lyric video for the title track, 'Wonder'. I hope you enjoy it and I have a giveaway below just for you!



As I mentioned above, I have a copy of 'Wonder' by Hillsong United to give way to one lucky reader. I was provided a review copy & giveaway copy by the ever gracious Capitol Christian Music Group. So thanks to them!

To enter to win, please fill out the form below. I will announce the winner (drawn randomly) shortly after the giveaway ends on 7/31/17. Good luck and feel free to share this post!

Hillsong United 'Wonder' CD Giveaway

Musical Monday- Through Your Eyes #musicalmonday #faith

It has been ages since I did a musical Monday post and I thought it would be fun. So, here is a song I am loving right now.

This song really has touched a place in my soul. It addresses something I try not to think about. Self-love. Now, I'm not talking about conceit. Not even talking about thinking I can take on the world by myself. No, I'm speaking to something much deeper. I'm talking about knowing my value in Christ.

It's something that God has been trying to get me to deal with for awhile now. And, it's finally starting to take hold and grow roots. I see me and see all my failures. My flaws. It's really easy to see ONLY those things instead of the things that God sees. I struggle most often with believing I am a new creation.

So, who are we in Christ? I found this printable on Pinterest and had to share it with you. Click on the image to be taken to the original page by Anita Huron. It's a great reminder to hang on your wall.

Which of these do you struggle with believing today?

Trust vs. Belief

{photo by purplejavatroll}

 I just started my fourth session of college. These babies FLY by. I know I have quite a few to go but at this rate I'll be done before I know it. I'm currently taking my first (of three) Anatomy & Physiology classes and College Math. I have to say I'm nervous about both. My hubby says "Yeah but you say that every time and you're fine" and he's so right. Why do I worry so much?

So far, I've gotten high A's in all my classes even the ones I was nervous about. I think I just need to trust that I'm where I'm supposed to be and God will bring me through it. At church on Sunday we talked about the difference between trust and belief. Our pastor related it to rock climbing. Belief is seeing someone else strapped in and knowing that the ropes will hold them. Trust is being strapped in, ourselves, stepping over the edge and knowing we will be held. It's so true.

I have been believing for years. Believing in God that is. But do I, on a daily basis, trust God with my life? Actually step out over the edge and trust. I don't think so. It's a hard thing to admit. Honestly, I think I've been close a few times. I think I've trusted and then reneged my trust occasionally.

What has that brought me? Fear. Such an abundance of fear and worry. What if I don't pass this test? What if I am wasting time and lots of money? What if? What if? What if? So, as of right now, I am silencing the "what ifs" with a new question.

When has God let me down before?

Answer: He hasn't. So, why would he start now. Oh sure, there have been lots of things in life that didn't turn out the way I anticipated. No, they were so much better in the long run. Yes, I've had so many hurts in my life. And I'm okay with that.

God has got me just like he always has. I just need to trust it.

Heart-Building Phrases

As a person, I tend to be hyper-critical of myself. I have these expectations to never appear foolish, or stupid. As a mom, I fear I've carried this over into parenting. The fear of others opinions finds its way into my heart, head, and voice without me realizing it. I get impatient, cranky, and sometimes, I know, my words make my daughter feel like she can do no right. It breaks my heart and leads to repentance. 

The good news? Today is a new day. I can't change how I acted then but today I can choose to love my daughter (and husband) like God loves each of us. So, here are some phrases that will build up your children's hearts instead of tearing them down.

You are important to me.

I am listening.

I love you as you are.

I trust you.

You are not alone.

I'm proud of you.

Don't give up.

I will always love you.

There's nothing I'd rather be doing right now.

There's no rush.

Keep up the good work.

I'm so glad I'm your mom.

Seeing you makes my heart happy.

Mistakes are a part of growing up. 

My prayer is that the damage I may have done with my words, fears, and critical spirit would be healed. Because honestly, I want to have a special relationship with my daughter...not control her. Not make her afraid of me. Or, afraid of making mistakes. She is a blessing to our family and I want her to truly believe that.

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Are Christians Hypocrites?

I have no excuse for my absence. Actually, I do. I've been cleaning. Deep cleaning. Like some people do in the spring. I've told you before I'm a procrastinator alright? A touch of my OCD has been rearing it's ugly head. Along with anxiety and a smidge of depression. Is smidge a word? No matter. I'm beginning to really believe that you are what you eat. Which leads us to this point.

I have not been eating well. 

I've been eating quite poorly actually. Not in quantity, oh no, but low in nutritional value for sure. My habits are back. Overeating anything that doesn't move except lots of fruits and veggies. Not moving my body. Forgetting my value in God's eyes.

The last one is probably key. In fact, I know it is. That's what happens when you stop growing in the faith. You don't sit where you left off. You drift backward uncontrollably. All those victories I experienced, and I don't just mean weight loss, have vanished in front of my eyes. Things like not eating my emotions, and trusting God.

I've been really "good" about praying for others lately. Not even a smidge (there's that word again) good about praying for myself and my struggles. Or, about spending time in the word. I need to center myself back on God. It's not about being a good Christian woman. It's not about checking off an item on a list. It's about connecting to the heart of God. 

I realize there have been a lot of seemingly "good" Christians in the news lately. The word hypocrite comes into play. And, while I would not excuse the actions of those people it does make me think. 

Every human is exactly that. Human. Even when someone accepts Christ into their life, they are still human. Still sinful by nature. We have been forgiven (and will always be so) but we still struggle. We do things that we despise and cannot help ourselves. 

For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do--this I keep on doing. -Romans 7:19

Others may see our behavior as hypocritical. I think it really depends on each persons heart. If we are sinning and could not care less and yet we still speak of others needing to repent then, yes, we are being hypocrites. If we are sinning and it breaks our heart each time, then I think we are in a different category entirely.

Why am I even talking about all this? We need to think before we judge someone else. We don't know their hearts. We can only guess. And, we are rarely right. Let's leave the judgement to God. There is so much hate and sin in this world but because of God there is beauty too. It's such a twisted sort of puzzle.

I will never understand it all on this side of Heaven. And, the older I get the more okay I am with that.

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The Lost Get Found

These are lyrics from a song I adore by Britt Nicole called The Lost Get Found. It's lyrics echo one of my core fears...standing out. As a kid I remember wishing to blend in. To not be seen. I was picked on quite a bit and being a sensitive child, it stung badly. It stayed with me for days, weeks, months, even years. I also wished for red hair and green eyes because, yeah, THAT would make me invisible. But whatever. 

How could I, or can I, want to blend in and also want to be noticed? To be special? The two don't coexist. Either I want to be a wallflower or the singer on the stage. Either I want to open myself up to the possibility of criticism and get freedom in the process or lock myself up in my house, wasting away. If nobody sees you, sees your story, sees how far you've come, then it is all wasted. There are people out there that need to hear about your struggle and how you got past it. How God got you past it. Because that breeds hope for them. 

And, that's how the lost get found.

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Strong Enough

I feel like so many of my friends are struggling right now. 

There are so many ways life can try to get the better of you.

Finances. Kids. Husbands. Family. Friends. Work. Health.

Don't forget that the one the wind and waves obey (Jesus) is strong enough to save you. 

He's strong enough for the big stuff, for the little stuff, for everything. Life may not go the way we want it to but he holds us up. 

Is there anything I can pray for you about? Leave a comment or email me at lovejuliebug@gmail.com and know you aren't alone.

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No Force Of Hell

This is my prayer today:

Fill me with the strength and love of Christ.

It's a big prayer because the strength and love of Christ is big.

The love of Christ is so great and wide. How wide? It encompasses everyone in this world. Everyone that's ever lived. Try to wrap your head around that one. I still can't. 

Fill me with the strength and love of Christ. Show me what that truly means. Awake my heart to the greater cause...to love others as Christ loves them. All of them, not just the ones I want to love.

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When "I'll Pray for You" is Overused

There was a time not so long ago that me saying the phrase "I'll pray for you" often meant nothing of the sort. It should have been a promise. A powerful statement. But instead I was using it as a term of comfort when I had nothing else to say. Not only was it essentially a lie but I was robbing the person of the prayers they truly needed. Now, I'm not being conceited here and saying that my prayers are magical or special. Not at all. In fact, I'm fairly certain God can do anything without my help. But, the thing is praying isn't a suggestion, it's a command. 

It doesn't say "pray if you want to" or "pray when the time is right" it says "pray continually"and that is something I have been trying to work on. So, I've been making a concerted effort to not overuse the phrase "I'll pray for you" as well. If I say it for everything and then don't pray at all then that is not fair to that person and I feel guilty as well. 

My prayer today: 

God, please help me to truly pray for other people and not use "I'll pray for you" as a flippant phrase. I know you long for me to truly care about others and direct them to you. Thank you for the people in my life. Amen. 

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My Thought Life Could Use An Overhaul

Time for another confession. I think too much. I even think too much about thinking too much. Over analyzing. Judging myself. I am so flipping harsh with my thoughts. If anyone in the world were to say even one of these things to me I would want to slap them but when it's me - I just let it slide. Treat it as fact. But the fact is when it comes to the things that run through my mind I could be considered a Mean Girl. 

From Pinterest

Not only am I my own Mean Girl but I think about situations that haven't occurred yet and probably won't. I attempt to predict the future and how I might react to any situation basically. Do you know how much stress this adds to my day? My thought life could use an overhaul. Are you with me?

So, how do I overhaul my thought life? Here are some ideas. 

Attack it. Question everything you think. Challenge it. It's so easy for me to get caught up in my mind and take everything I think as fact. I need to be active in challenging my own thoughts to see what is real and what is not.

Learn what God says about you. God loves us. He loves us regardless of our shortcomings. As a Christian, I know I am a new creation but that does not necessarily change our thought life. I need to discover by reading the Bible and prayer who I am in Christ.

Stop acting out situations in your brain that haven't happened yet. I struggle with this often. It comes out in a couple different ways. One is based in anxiety, trying to always have the right response to a situation that might happen. The other is more based in negativity by imagining the worst scenario possible happening. It's all about control for me.

Pray and pray again. My day is one big prayer when I'm doing it right. Prayer does not have to be a big prayer at bedtime. That is great but it shouldn't be your whole prayer life. I find the days when my mind consistently turns to God to be the best days I have.

Think on what is true. Easier said than done I realize. I stick to this verse as a sort of mantra. 

 

I hope these ideas help you as they help me. What kind of thoughts fill your mind? Are they thoughts that help or hurt you?

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Being Used By God - What Inspires Me

There are a lot of people in my everyday life that touch my heart. For that I am truly blessed. And, sometimes, there are people whom I've never met, except through their blog, that bless my socks off. What is it that inspires me? Is it seeing adorable crafts, perfect outfits, or beautiful faces? No. Those things are nice. They are, but what inspires me is so much more.

My inspiration to do better. to be better is in broken lives. It is in honesty. It is in seeing those people that are so deep in hurt and still have their hands firmly grasped on hope. It is in seeing joy. It is in seeing love and grace lived out. In faith that is strong even when the person is not sure of a single thing outside of Christ.

Because that, my friends, is life. Life lived well. It's not about appearing perfect. It's not about hiding your pain and flaws from others. It's letting God use YOU, your weaknesses, and your story, for HIS glory. Letting Him use those things that make us want to run and hide to encourage others by letting His light shine through. 

Recently, I was introduced to a blog called Mundane Faithfulness written by Kara Tippetts. A friend on Facebook had liked one of her posts and thus, my journey into her world began. Anyone who knows me knows that I struggle with anxiety. One of my main anxieties is dying. I don't really talk about that but it's true. 

That's what makes Kara's posts so dear to my heart. You see, Kara is dying from cancer. We'll all die...someday...but she is faced with the pain of cancer every moment of every day. She is literally fading. But, as she fades from this world to the next, she is sharing her heart. Her struggle. Her faith. The realness of what I read both breaks my heart and inspires me to live life in a way that is honoring to God. In her posts, she asks questions like "Where do you keep people at a distance- afraid to let them see your suffering?" and "How are you faking strength today?" Questions that most people, myself included, don't ask themselves. Questions that let the light shine into my soul.

Her story, her life is being used, and will continue to be used, by God to touch others. God doesn't NEED to use us but he chooses to use us. Chooses. And, you don't have to struggle with addiction, or cancer, or anything that is "major" to be used by God. Just be real. Are you having a tough day with the kids? Feel like ripping your hair out because the laundry needs done again? Are you imperfect? Good! So, is everyone else in this world. Show someone else love and grace and Jesus today. It might just be today that they need it most.

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Time Flies Being A Mom

I don't even begin to understand how we are already eleven days into 2015. I feel like I'm going to blink and it will be this time next year. How does time go so quickly sometimes and so slowly others? As the mom of a young child, you might know what I mean. Sometimes it feels like one day can last forever especially when your tiny one has colic. Ugh. And yet, you turn around and your newborn is rolling over. Then turning one. How do these long days turn into fast years? 
Our newborn daughter is six. Well, six and a half according to her. We are halfway through her Kindergarten year. Most of the time I think I'm in denial of that. She is changing so quickly from her jack o' lantern smile that is filling in already, to her height - just over 49 inches already. One day she freaks out about me attempting to change her earrings and then yesterday she was completely ready for me to do it. 
It seems like once I adjust to being a mom of a certain stage or age, she changes. That is life I guess. Not comfortable for those of us who want things to stay the same. Being part of Celebrate Recovery, which is for more than just substance abuse by the way, has shown me how much I want control in my life. It leaks out into every facet of my life. Parenting. Marriage. Friendship. Even my eating. 
But, this control is an illusion as most of you well know. Time passes and things change. One day all this noise and chaos will calm down. My house will emptier and quieter. And, I will miss the chaos I wished away so flippantly. She will not be my little six year old girl, so sweet and sassy, forever. I must enjoy it while it's here.
Time flies being a mom. Make memories that last.

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Eighteen Years and the Meaning of Love

Eighteen years ago today the words found in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 were in our wedding. We didn't know then what they truly meant. Or, at least, I didn't. I thought I knew what love was. I really did. Love was sweet and fun and made me feel alive. There are so many stages of love and of marriage. You come into it with your own baggage and have to learn what it's like to grow and live together. We have definitely had our share of hard times but I wouldn't trade them. That's hard to say sometimes but love is proved and forged in the hard times.

That's not to say that I don't feel the same things as the day we wed. I feel them, maybe more now than ever. They've intensified. They've blossomed. And these words may sound completely cheesy but they're honest and true. And I'm also not saying that I have it figured it out after eighteen years. Not even close.

I do think that God's been working on my heart to get some of the verse above hammered into our daily lives. Especially patience. Oh, people. Don't pray for patience unless you truly mean it. I mean, honestly, the only way to learn patience is to have things to be patient about. It doesn't come about magically though sometimes I wish it would.

Love, true love, reflects God. His character. Love is not a word. It's an action. A choice. Each day I have to make a conscious decision of whether I will be patient, kind, keep no record of wrongs. But, don't get the wrong idea...I don't do this alone. I could never be the kind of wife I want to be on my own. God does that in me. Through me.

God's love never fails. So, when we rely on God to love our spouse through us, that love will never fail either. I am so blessed to have this man. When I get to lay my head on my husband's chest and just be his wife. When he holds me close and tells me how much he loves me even still. I am so thankful, I could cry. Sometimes I do.

So, when you are in the middle of a rough spot or at the top of a mountain...keep your chin up. Love always perseveres.

Love Note From God

It's the little things that makes me keenly aware of how God watches out for us. I've been needing printer ink and have not bought it yet because it costs an arm and a leg. The other day my friend asked me what kind of ink I use and hands me a cartridge that is exactly what I needed. She just happened to have it leftover from a yard sale. Coincidence? Perhaps. I don't think so. My heart tells me it is a little love note from God. 

There are so many times I have had this happen. Well, not this exactly of course but there will be something that happens that seems too sweet, too perfect. And, in that moment I just know it is not coincidental. I feel the need to add that I do not believe in the very popular prosperity gospel which says that God will reward us with financial prosperity but I do believe that God will take care of us. What a blessing and comfort it is to be able to rest in this truth. Now, the trick is actually letting myself rest in it on a regular basis.

Baptized at 6

Our church does something once a year called worship in the park. Pretty self explanatory. Normally, it is quite sunny and hot since it is in August. This year I was smart and brought an umbrella for shade. Of course, the kiddo snatched that up for herself. Reminder: sunblock should be put on everyone including Mommy.  At the end of the service the pastor invited people up that felt the call to be baptized. Abby asked what it was. Then, she said "I wanna be baptized!" We were hesitant as we were when she said she asked Jesus into her heart. Why? Well, I suppose it's due to the fact that it took me 18 years to find God and we didn't want her to do it flippantly. So, we asked her why. And, we hesitated. She talked to a good friend of ours who said she believed she truly knew what she was doing. Still we paused. The breakthrough was the fact that I didn't want her to rush into it BUT I didn't want to squelch her desire to do so either. Due to that, we agreed to let her get baptized reminding her that it was a big commitment - telling everyone there & God that she was following him and doing His will for her life. She enthusiastically agreed. My heart swelled with emotion when she was put under the water and pulled up again symbolizing being buried with Christ and raised up with Him. Am I certain that she understands it all as well as we do? No. I will never know that for certain. However, I do know that I am not in charge of knowing that. It's not my job. She has someone infinitely more capable that holds her in His hand.

Is Physical Health a Spiritual Issue?

© Andres Rodriguez | Dreamstime Stock Photos

This is a loaded topic. Many people, even believers, will probably balk at what I'm about to say. No harm is meant by it. I am simply trying to reach out to others who, like me, are searching for help. Weight has always been an issue for me. Well, not when I was a tiny 4 lb 12 oz baby born a month early. But, seemingly ever since I have been struggling with being the pudgy or chunky one. And, into my adult years the overweight and obese one. 
For me, I've always known that weight was not the real issue. The issue is much deeper. Abuse. Eating to shove things down. It became a habit. The habit continued. Instead of dealing with stresses in my life I continued to use food as a way of coping instead of...wait for it...turning to God. So, when I pose the question "Is Physical Health a Spiritual Issue" I am speaking from my heart. From my experience. Honestly, I know I'm not alone. So many people use food, and other things, as crutches instead of simply turning to the One who made us. Maybe we don't believe God exists, that He really loves us, that He cares about our everyday problems. Maybe someone has hurt us or someone we love in the name of religion. Maybe hypocrites have caused you to stumble. Maybe we think we should be able to do this thing called life on our own. There are so many things that can keep us, and I mean all of us, from turning to God. 
The spiritual and the physical have never been connected in my mind. Not until I started doing The Daniel Plan and Celebrate Recovery. Both programs are Saddleback Church ministries and both are excellent tools that God is using to change me. By the way, Celebrate Recovery may be a 12 step program but it's not just for Alcoholics and Drug Addicts...it's for any hurts, habits, or hang ups you might be fighting in your life. If you are dealing with weight loss or food addiction, I hope you find what you need to change YOUR life.

10 Things I Want Our Daughter To Know

Since becoming a Mom I've noticed that everything is different. I don't watch movies the same way. I don't see media the same way. I think about things I never have before. See, I think that the big, wide world out there is vying for our almost 6 year olds attention. And, honestly, I don't want her to learn from it. I want her to learn the truth. Below are things that I believe and earnestly want her to learn.

God is real. He is with you every moment of every day. He loves you beyond measure.  He is not just an antiquated fictional character in a dusty book. 
You can do so much more than you think you can. Our minds are often not a reliable source of what we can do. Why? Because we have moods and emotions. Don't let anyone (even yourself) tell you that you can't do something.
We will always be there for you, loving you and supporting you. No matter what you do. No matter what decisions you make. You are our daughter and we love you.
Anything worth having is worth the wait. If you don't believe me, look in the mirror. We waited what felt like forever for you. I would gladly do it again if need be. The same can be said for anything else that is important.
Being quirky and unique is cool. Trying to be a carbon copy of someone else is not. Seriously, there is only one you. Don't waste "you" by trying to mimic someone else. I've read the quote "Be a first rate version of yourself rather than a second rate version of someone else." and I agree with it whole heartedly.
You are approved by God. His is the only approval you need. This is one that I've just recently begun to understand. We can spend so much time trying to seek approval from others. In the end, others will never fill that void inside you.
Treat everyone the way you would want to be treated, not just the ones you want to be nice to. This is a hard one. The world will tell you to be nice to those you like and avoid everyone else. That's not how I want you to love. 
Work hard. If you work hard in life, you will have reason to rest your head well at night. Do all you do to honor God. 
Don't make excuses for your faults. Face them head on and with God's help you can overcome them. This is another one that is easier said than done sometimes. I'm working on it now. 
You don't need someone else to complete you, despite what Disney might make you think. I think this speaks for itself. Obviously, since I'm a Christian, I believe that God is the one who fills the voids in your life not another person. Don't get me wrong, I love my husband so much but I don't think that "he completes me" like Hollywood would portray. 

A Little Bit of Mud

God is in the details.
God is in the mess, the mud.
God is in that place where you find only He could possibly work this out.
That's where you find Him.
You find Him waiting with open arms.
Asking you to simply lay down your plans.
Your worries. Your hurts.
God can do amazing things with a little bit of mud.